Some of you know for the past year, I am peri-menopausal. The hot flashes come occasionally, but it really does not bother me that much.
What has, and does, bother me is how my body feels. Some days, I can honestly say that my body is not mine.
I seem more prone to injury; sometimes not even knowing what I have actually done to cause the injury. My body composition is shifting, and my fitness levels to some degree. Now, I can cope with the occasional hot flash, because it is just that …. it is gone in a flash. The rest of it, so far, leaves me in unmapped territory.
I have always used my body. Throughout my teens and even through university, I trained and competed in various sports. As a teenager, it was softball and martial arts. At university, it was yoga, martial arts and women’s rugby. Upon leaving university, I started working in the fitness industry and so I carried on using my body for my job.
Now, in my mid-forties, I seem to be losing my ability to predict how my body will react at any given time. When I get over an injury, something else appears. No pain, no gain …. hmmmmm.
So I am now surrendering to this process, as challenging as it is mentally for me. It is part of being a woman and it is an element of the process of life. It is part of ageing, and I intend to do so gracefully. Rather than dismiss the sensations, hope that they will go away and plough through my training and yoga practice, I need to accept the present moment and listen to my body; listen closely enough so I can act with foresight, rather than hindsight. And, this means I have to take a more humble attitude towards myself; to be completely mindful and respectful of my body.
I need to become a beginner again.
This, is Yoga.
An opportunity to awaken new way to my Yoga practice, my training, my body, my Self.
An opportunity to move forwards in life.
And …. breathe.
Have you gone through this period of your life? Are you currently going through it as I am?
What are/were your experiences? Please share …
Much love … x
